Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Mom

Every year when Thanksgiving is around the corner, I think about how thankful I am for certain things and mostly people in my life. I always think that I need to (want to) write something about it so they know, but have never have managed to do so. Well the kids are still asleep and I decided to get down to it- finally.

This year, as it happens, my mom has been on a European cruise with my Aunt Sarah and Uncle Jim for the past two weeks and as jealous as I am that she gets to be there and I don't, what her trip has really put into stark perspective is how much I miss her.

Its only been two weeks and its really not a big deal, but there are so many things throughout the week that I just NEED to tell her. Sick kids, home decorating choices, endless banter about flowers...the election!

Seriously, my mom needs to come back already!

There was a time a few years ago when I never thought I would say these words or even think them. Because of how I grew up, we didn't get to know each other very well and over the years I had made a lot of assumptions. We would argue. Neither of us are pushovers. Funny thing is we are very similar.

Even in the times that were good, there was something about me that never really believed she would be there for me through thick and thin.

The last few years we've had together with my mom living in San Diego, I feel have taken their time on us, thrown situations at us, tested us and ultimately have knit the solid footings of what can only be described as true friendship, love and most importantly for me trust. Trust comes with time and time we have had and this trust is what we have to show for it.

Not trust that everything will always be perfect. But trust that even if it isn't, I know that my mom will be just as miserable as me if we are in an argument, will be just as likely as me to say she is sorry. Trust that without a doubt, she is someone who loves my kids as much as I do, or at least as close as it comes, someone who is truly invested in their life and happiness as much as I am and who is honestly invested in mine.

My mom is an interesting person. She is a one of a kind. Someone I am truly proud to have as my mom. I am thankful for the time we have had together and that we will continue to have. I am thankful for the irreverence as well as the passion and empathy that I inherited from her, that has made it possible for both of us to get out of bad situation after bad situation and that allows us to be here today and have everything we now have. And we have a lot. We have everything that is important.

I love you mom and I am proud to be your daughter and I am truly thankful to have you as my mom.

Now hurry up and get back from that f***ing cruise!